Luciana Medeiros

Many adults, when observing their children’s talking and behavior, or other family member’s children, are amazed at how confident, mature, and independent some of them seem to be, as if they were much older!

Parents may struggle with their children’s behavior. In some cases, when they give in to the little ones’ wishes and demands because they can’t find any counterargument,  parents end up allowing their children  to do whatever they want. Have you seen that?

Kardec, in the Gospel According to Spiritism, in the  chapter about the Corporeal Kinship and Spirit Kinship¹, states that “The body proceeds from the body, but the spirit does not proceed from the spirit, because the spirit already existed before the formation of the body.” This means that it was not the incarnate parents who created the spirit of their children, despite having given them the physical condition to be born. This explains why children can talk and act as if they were older,  but there is still more to learn.

The Spirit is immortal and created by God. When it inhabits the body of a child, despite its simple appearance, the soul carries with it good and bad feelings, as well as several vices, and the origin can be found in selfishness, which may lead to moral downfalls. Therefore, the child we see and know now is actually an old spirit that, like us, has lived many times and is now in a new experience to improve itself.

The forgetfulness of the past in corporeal life is allowed by  God so that the Spirit that is in a mission or atonement may be more accessible to education and work on changing old habits and ideas. The physical body, in this phase, mainly because its organs, mental and psychological capacity are under development, restricts the access to information about past lives. The soul, by receiving the support and guidance from parents and guardians, may  prevent new moral falls allowing it to develop virtues such as altruism and humility in this new life, and practice them when around people.

As parents and guardians, we have much to teach and educate the incarnated souls that are in the children’s body, through the experience and wisdom we have acquired throughout life. However, although living together may not be the easiest of relationships, it is necessary to be close and available to fulfill our role and push them towards the moral transformations that they need, through the noble practice of discipline and the performance of their duties at home, no matter how small they may be.

Emmanuel, in the book “The Pathway,  The  Truth & Life”, compares reincarnation to an important trip (and not a simple ride) taken by boat. In this metaphor, the spirit is a sailor who needs a boat (physical body). In addition, as needed for  any long voyage, planning, guidance from experienced sailors, provisions, and “sailor’s skills” are required to reach the end of the voyage in order to be successful.

Childhood, in a figurative language compared to the metaphor created by Emmanuel, would be the preparation phase of the trip, not only in relation to the boat, but also in the acquisition of necessary knowledge (such as what is right and wrong), provisions for difficult moments (such as the need to take care of health and the ability to connect with God through prayer), and experience, so as not to be distracted by the landscape and end up running the risk of “going off course” or getting lost (by the influence of less fortunate companies or by the pure satisfaction of vices through the misuse of free will). 

According to the metaphor, the youthful phase corresponds to the moment when the sailor takes the boat and, full of hopes, sets sail for the open sea. The old age is the arrival in port.

Now think about it, can you imagine if a sailor “in real life” is not well trained? If he receives inconsistent and even wrong information from experienced sailors? What could happen to him during his trip? The same goes for our children (the sailors) being prepared by us (the experienced sailors) for life’s experiences in case we do not fulfill our role properly. Unfortunately, this is what we see  as a result of many daily disasters caused by drug use, violence of all kinds, lack of commitment to life, and even suicide; tragedies that could often be avoided.

It is crucial that children and young people are supported through simple language and true examples, according to the level of understanding of their ages. It is also  very important to be careful with information that can confuse or distort what they need to know.

It may happen that, in our family life, sometimes there are arguments and even confrontations with our children, so that their wishes may prevail over what we have to offer them, which they do not always like. However, this reincarnation may be an “appointment” from previous lives, in which we do not know the commitments that have bound us to our children. We don’t know, for example, if in some sad chapter of our previous  lives, who was the victim or the perpetrator. Therefore, don’t bargain! Don’t give in to tantrums and provocations out of moral weakness! 

In this life, we are responsible for the little ones, and we usually know what is right to do – and when we don’t, it is also our responsibility to find out. The important thing is that we speak and teach with the moral authority that is ours in this incarnation, in a sincere and loving way, independent of whom may have made a mistake. Let us be attentive and careful in our actions so that they do not promote a disservice in the children’s education and responsibilities we have taken with them and God, making the children weak, disoriented and confused to face the vicissitudes of life. 

And last but not least, we need to teach those under our tutelage to be grateful for life and God, starting by our example, recognizing the world and the universe, as well as life and reincarnation, as proofs of Divine love and of which we need to become worthy. 

Our children, in the future, will be able to do much for themselves and for the world. But first, let us fulfill our duties towards them and introduce them to Jesus from an early age so that He can keep them company and be for them the example that we cannot yet be, even when we cannot be by their side, both in the most difficult and the happiest moments of their existence!


1 Kardec, Allan. The Gospel According to Spiritism. Chapter XIV, Honor thy Father and Mother. The corporal kinship and the spiritual kinship, item 8.

² Xavier, Francisco Candido. The Pathway,  The  Truth & Life. Lesson 151, Youth. by the Spirit Emmanuel.

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